Recently I keep getting a loud shouting voice in my head, which tells me off. Normally when I eat it's just me telling myself off, and hating myself so so much. But it's like suddenly I have this second voice, and it's so so loud, like it takes over my brain, screaming at me.
So I have had a 2 day plateau. Which is frustrating, because I did bloody well on Sunday, and today is going well. ARGH this weight loss is slow and so so frustrating. But I am lking my chest at the moment, my collar bones are showing nicely, and my rib cage is starting to stick out a little. I hate that this makes me happy. But I feel like there is no alternative.
I thought I would give you a description of what happens when I try to recover. I binge. All the time. Non stop. No purging. This, for me, is hell and worse than my current situation. I see no inbetween. I am so so jealous of those who can eat and stop when they are full, it seems such a foreign concept.
On good news I am working bloody hard at school, and am LOVING it. Hard work ist gut!
Thankyou for your brilliant commets, I appreciate them more than I can say!