Wednesday, 2 March 2011

Pride comes before a fall.

I posted a post a few days ago about how well I was doing with food. Today I had such a crap day, I ate so much and for the first time in AGES I found my self in the bathroom, about to vomit. Thank God I stopped myself in time. But on a good note I didn't weigh myself today (feels like a very small victory compared to the crappiness that was the rest of the day.)

In the space of a day my mind has started idolising  restrictive behaviour. But the thing that weirdly upsets me is that I know I can't restrict. I know I will just binge later. I guess I really will NEVER be as thin as I'd like.

Okay to stop this turning into the start of a relapse, here is my list of why NOT to restrict:


  • The only weigh to loose weight is to eat healthy, proper meals and do some exercise. Even though I shouldn't loose weight if I'm going to RESTRICTING WON'T HELP.
  • Restricting means feeling tired, grumpy, angry, faint. 
  • Restricting means my mind will start obsessing about weight, food, calories, which I KNOW is not a fun place to be. 
  • Restricting leads to binges, which leads to purging which leads to restricting. And the cycle carries on. 
  • I AM NOT DEFINED BY MY WEIGHT. 
  • God loves me no matter what my weight is.

5 comments:

helen said...

your list is perfect. absolutely perfect.

Haley said...

I am LOVING this list.
It was the perfect reminder for me to have Multigrain Crisps with my sandwich, carrots&hummus at lunch today.
You're doing great! Keep fighting ED :)
<3 Haley

Sairs said...

This is an awesome list. I think even being able to say those things is really a huge thing and really important. Go you!
*hugs*
Sarah

Angela said...

I love your list!
May I borrow it;-)

Part Of Being Sane said...

what a fabulous list :)